December 2011
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“And now we welcome the new year, full of things that have never been.”
– Rainer Maria Rilke (via misswallflower)
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Gentleman's Times: U.S. Sales Figures for... →
Records just don’t sell like they use to…
gentlemanstimes:
Courtesy of Matthew P, here’s a great article about the sales of Pitchfork’s top 50 records. A little perspective: as he points out in the comments (although not in the post, for some reason), it’s extremely rare to top a million these days (only Jay and Kanye’s Watch the Throne makes it to that…
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102 stupid questions a high school kid should be...
1. Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it?
I don't think so. Sometimes these things just come out and you want them to eventually mean it but it's too early or comes out as an act of desperation. I've been there too.
2. Would you date an 18-year-old at the age you are now?
NEVER
3. When’s the last time you were aggravated and happy at the same time?
the other day at band practice, making really inspiring music, drummer going on and on about some dream he had..."dewd, we're trying to make something here!"
4. Would you ever smile at a stranger?
I do all the time- "hiya, can I getcha started with any cocktails?" (BARF)
5. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?
nah, would have to actually be talking to someone now wouldn't I?
6. Have you heard a song that reminds you of someone today?
Heard this Nuclear Seasons (Balam Acab remix) and it reminded me of my old exgf Diana for some reason. Also, heard this dance track Chocolate Bar by Space Ranger and it reminded my of my friend Ryan (Hey Cliche). I won't even get into the rest...
7. What exactly are you wearing right now?
black tee, glasses, hoodie, and pbr socks
8. How often do you listen to music?
um, constantly? who doesn't?
9. Do you wear jeans or sweats more?
huh? um, duh...I'm not a bum
10. Do you think your life will change dramatically before 2012?
considering there's like, 7 days left in 2011, I don't think so. I hope it does in the next year...might be more of a leap of faith but there's gonna be a big change...I hope
11. Are you a social or an antisocial person?
both, it depends on just how much socializing you're really asking me to do. I have a limit...
12. Have you ever kissed someone whose name begins with the letter ‘A’?
yeah, she was probably the love of my life so far. Pretty fucking incredible, and actually pretty sad. Hope that changes soon tho
13. What about ‘R’?
yeah, but they've been pretty bad at making out for the most part. I mean, I want that to change but that's the draw I've had so far. Rihannon? Riley? Rhonda? Risa? Are you out there? Wanna make that change? : )
14. Can you drive a stick shift?
No. I feel like this was actually a check in the "not so attractive" column in my last relationship though, haha. I mean, I'm willing to learn just not on new $40k automobile. My luck, the tranny would have been destroyed in like the first 10 mins
15. Do you care if people talk badly about you?
Yeah, I mean who doesn't? Anyone who says they're not is just being defensive or defiant and using it as motivation for competition or something
16. Are you going out of town soon?
Yeah, next month I'm gonna visit some friends in LA. Need to get out of Chicago
17. When was the last time you cried?
Can't remember because, um, boys, and especially men, don't cry
18. Have you ever told someone you loved them?
Of course and I meant it. I've been in love twice and I really was "in love" with them. It was beautiful and transcendent and terrifying and then it ended and it was incredibly sad. Also, I told my mom that loved her just the other day- I tell her all the time, cause she's my mom and she's great
19. If you could change your eye color, would you?
nah, I'm cool. Not really on my priority list
20. Is there a girl who you would do absolutely everything for?
yeah, probably...but it's fading. I think the circumstances would have to change pretty dramatically for that to be true actually
21. Name something you dislike about the day you’re having.
unmotivated and the weather isn't helping
22. Is it cute when guys kiss you on your forehead?
See I probably shouldn't be answering these stupid questions- guys don't kiss me on the forehead. I think my friend Adam once kissed me on the forehead but he was terribly drunk at the time
23. Are you dating the last person you talked to?
no, I'm not dating my roommate
24. What are you sitting on right now?
couchy
25. Does anyone regularly (other than family) tell you they love you?
Yeah one of my best friends Jane and my boss Jim- I think they really mean it too
26. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?
are you serious?? of course. Go listen to the Smiths...
27. Who was the last person you talked to before you went to bed last night?
My bandmates/couple of my best friends Adam and Jesse- had a little gathering at the castle, got high, drank a few cocktails, laughed, and listened to some records.
28. Do you get a lot of colds?
nah
29. Where is the shirt you are wearing from?
aa
30. Does anyone hate you?
I don't think so...hope not. I don't really evoke hate for people (at least I'd like to think so)
31. Do you have any empty alcohol bottles hidden somewhere in your room?
no, I'm not in high school or college
32. Do you like watching scary movies?
yeah, just finished watching American Horror Story season 1 yesterday.
33. Do you want your tongue pierced?
GROSS. BARF
34. If you had to delete one year of your life completely, which would it be?
hmmm. There was a period in 2003-2004 I could let disappear. And there was a years worth of time in 2007 and 2008 that really sucked. I would almost say there was a time in 2009 that I really didn't like but I learned so much about myself that year that it was totally worth it
35. Did you have a dream last night?
Yeah, all I remember was that I was forgetting something and I woke up really worried and felt guilty. I was actually pretty happy to wake up from that one
36. When was the last time you told someone you loved them?
Besides telling my moms the other day, I told my roommate and one of my old best friends Adam that I loved them at our party last saturday...we were drunk but I remember that. It's been about 3 and a half years since I've been in a relationship and told someone I loved them. Can't tell if that's sad or if that's just me making smarter choices
37. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?
Ya know, I kinda want to get married. I don't know if that's something that would happen in the next five years but yeah maybe?
38. Do you think someone has feelings for you?
I think so- a couple of gals. Just wish it was mutual
39. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?
Actually, yeah. I think someone is...at work. They're like "Dino's coming in here soon to help with this...at least he better be." And in that sense, I should probably quit answering these questions
40. Did you have a good day yesterday?
Ya know, I totally did. Good band practice, good times opening presents with the friends christmas, productive overall- we wrote a new song
41. Think back 2 months ago; were you in a relationship?
last one ended 3 months to the day. So, no.
42. In the next 48 hours, will you hang out with a girl?
Gonna hang with my friend Rachel today and then tomorrow my old exgf and I are gonna have a drink together I hope
43. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?
Yeah but not in a way that I could actually take seriously. It was either out of desperation or in a way that seemed slightly ungenuine. I want someone to say it to me and really mean it and actually feel it though
44. What’s the best part about school?
The best part of high school and college was the friends I made. Otherwise, high school was terrifying and confusing and scary and college was totally overpriced and a joke. Don't get me started...
45. Do you have any pictures on your Facebook?
well yeah, dumbie
46. Do you ever pass notes to your friends in school?
UGH
47. Do you replay things that have happened in your head?
everyone does, it's how we analyze our actions
48. Were you single over the last summer?
nope
49. Is your life anything like it was two years ago?
in some ways. couple of years ago I was DJing for a living and kinda broke. Life is much more stable, better these days
50. What are you supposed to be doing right now?
heading down to the restaurant and then working on this dance track I keep on procrastinating
51. Do you hate the last guy you had a conversation with?
no. no. no. I think a high school girl is suppose to answer this
52. Are you nice to everyone?
hell no. I'm an actual real person that experiences a variety of emotions
53. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to?
yeah, it was really weird when it happened. But then it turned into a really wonderful relationship and I still have fond memories of it. Friends-first relationships can be really special
54. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?
I'm a decent human being for christ sake! GOD
55. Are you good at hiding your feelings?
I can be...sometimes. I'd say the majority of the time I'm not very good at it. Probably a weakness, come to think of it
56. Do you think you like someone?
I guess, but it's fading. I'm almost over it completely but not quite yet
57. Have you kissed someone whose name starts with a ‘J’?
Yeah, my high school crush, Jamie, was an amazing kisser. She basically taught me the proper "hot makeout." I'd like to thank her for that. It's not like I have any "moves" these days but the ideas are still firmly ingrained into my "lust instincts." Wow, I've never used the term "lust instincts" until just then...weird. Also, I've dated a couple other "J" girls and they were all fantastic kissers.
58. Do you prefer to be friends with girls or boys?
Both have merits I think. Have a best friend who is a girl but it gets harder as you get older to have opposite sex friends if yer hetero
59. Has anyone of your friends ever seen you cry?
Not sure...I mean NO. duh!
60. Do you hate anyone?
No. I think I've hated in the past but hate is a wasteful emotion. Fills you with darkness and only leads to harmful things
61. How’s your heart?
It's okay. I think there's enough love in there for me and someone else and maybe, just maybe some little boos too...but that wouldn't happen for quite some time
62. Is there something that happened in your past that you hate talking about?
Yeah, December 3rd, 2004. Rarely comes up but when it does it brings up some pretty bad feelings every time
63. Have you ever cried over a girl?
Don't you cry tonight! http: //youtu.be/zRIbf6JqkNc
64. Who is probably talking a load of crap about you right now?
God I hope no one is...maybe the peeps at the bar/restaurant but it would be all in fun
65. Are your toenails painted pink?
PRPL
66. Will your next kiss be a mistake?
God I hope not...
67. Girls love it when boyfriends cry; correct?
how in the hell would I know?? BARF
68. Have your pants ever fallen down in public?
metaphorically, yes
69. Who was the last person you were on the phone with?
PIZZADEWD
70. How do you look right now?
I'm looking pretty damn fine right now...laid back, chill yoooo
71. Do you have someone you can be your complete self around?
I think so but as I get older I feel more comfortable with myself so it's not as hard to not be myself. Plus I love my work life so it's pretty rare that I can't be myself
72. Can you commit to one person?
I'm a virgo, a monogamist, and a person that feels WAY too much guilt to be a cheater. Plus, I was raised catholic. IT'S LIKE I LIVE IN A GUILT PALACE 24 HOURS A DAY. But still, even past the guilt, betrayal is not in my blood (see virgo)
73. Do you have someone of the opposite sex you can tell everything to?
Yeah I think Jane hears a lot of my shit. But then again, do you ever really tell anyone everything?
74. Have you ever felt replaced?
Yeah, with friends I have and I think at work I have too. There's been a little weirdness or jealousy but for the most part I've felt the replacement was understandable
75. Did you wake up cranky?
Not really
76. Are you a jealous person?
I've come to realize that I can be jealous. But usually I'm pretty good about it. Or maybe it's that my jealousy gets funneled into other emotions or maybe like a competitiveness- in a healthy way
77. Are relationships ever worth it?
I think so. I feel like loving another person, being in love with them, is the most fascinating, difficult, important, challenging, and yet totally fulfilling of human experiences. And while it seems so vulnerable and exposed to let someone in and see you for who you are, see the flaws, see the insecurities so clearly, you have to do it if you ever want to really love someone. Why would you want to live a human life without sharing the love you have inside you? We're unique in this way, give it a shot...
78. Anyone you’re giving up on?
Yeah, I'm in the beginning stages of "being over her." Getting the last bits of her out of my system. It's hard when you spend some much time thinking about someone and the intricacies of your relationship with them and letting go of it...like, forever. Going back is just about impossible. It's like some cheesy cliff/life/death/reborn metaphor- all of those sayings and analogies are true and we all know it.
79. Currently wanting to see anyone?
Soon- not right now probably. It's nice to think about seeing someone new. I think I need a SLOW build into the next relationship. Something that feels as important as it should be.
80. Name something you have to do tomorrow?
I have to work on Christmas Eve and Christmas. FUCK.
81. Last person you cried in front of?
BELCHHHH
82. Is there someone you will never forget?
I hope I never forget plenty of people and experiences. I hope I take the experiences I've had with anyone who was close to me past my grave, past this life, and on into whatever the hell comes next. My experiences, my memories I've shared are all I have to tell me that I'm existing, real or unreal, in a finite world. I have to believe that things happen and they matter or else my existential crisis hotline starts ringing and ringing and ringing and I get worried about what I like to call "the nothing" that may or may not happen when we all die. Does our soul get wiped clean and it starts all over and I forget who I was in this life? I'm not ready to feel ok with that. So yes, I don't wanna forget anyone that feels close to me, feels important to me- girlfriends, best friends, family, etc.
83. Do you think the person you have feelings for is protective of you?
Probably not...maybe. But it doesn't really matter- the stakes have been claimed and no one is in a position to care. But maybe, who knows.
84. If the person you wish to be with were with you, what would you be doing right now?
Not what I wish we were doing and that's all that matters right? haha
85. Are you over your past?
No and I don't think anyone should be over their past. Your past is who you are and, no matter how hard it may be, at some point, you need to confront those things in your past that you were so willing to jettison and understand them as fully as you're willing to allow yourself. Otherwise, moving forward becomes extremely difficult. Understanding and recognizing your past as someone you were (i.e. another version of your current self) is important in making wise decisions about the future.
86. Have you ever liked one of your best friends of the opposite sex?
Yeah, and it turned into full on relationship that I still think of as one of the best of my little life.
87. Is there anyone you can tell EVERYTHING to?
Is there really anyone you truly tell everything to? I use to think my therapist got all of my shit but she didn't- there was a filter there too.
88. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept?
Nah, I'm way over that. We're both better off at this point.
89. So, the last person you kissed just happens to arrive at your door at 3AM; do you let them in?
"What the hell are you doing here? Please leave, seriously."
90. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?
HA! There have been a couple actually- really sad and frustrating when that happens but I guess in a weird way it makes you feel better when it's over.
91. Will you be in a relationship in 2 months?
maybe. How in the hell am I suppose to know?? Ask the universe, not me
92. Is there anyone you know with the name Michael?
yeah, plenty of dudes. For some reason most of the Mikes I've ever known have been kinda awkward...
93. Have you ever kissed a Matthew?
yeah like 20 OMG
94. Were you in a relationship in January? How was it going?
No, I was alone and nothing was happening. I was trying to focus on music.
95. Were you happy with the person you liked in March?
Was starting to have a crush on someone in March so yeah I guess I was happy with them...
96. Don’t tell me lies, is the last person you texted attractive?
yeah she is. She's "cute" though...and she's a friend. She's like my little sister.
97. Who do you have texts from?
lots of people trying to make plans...talking on the phone is, like, not an option anymore in the "cell phone" era
98. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say?
I wouldn't say anything. In my head I'd say, no matter how awesome they were, "you can do better than that."
99. Have you ever kissed someone older than you?
Generally don't go for the older gals but I think it's possible that I've kissed an older woman and it wouldn't be out of the question if the situation would arise...
100. Who’s in your profile picture with you?
some stranger...he's all drunk or something...probably...wait, I just changed my profile picture. just me
101. Ever kissed under fireworks?
I have a really nice memory of this from just after college. and there was something nice from this summer...
102. Has anybody ever given you butterflies?
Like in a box? That's kinda cute. Maybe when I was a kid. But those were caterpillars, which is an even better gift btw because then you get to see them grow up into BUTTERFLIES! Woohoo
sincerely replied to a bunch of juicy questions mostly intended for the likes of a high school senior and just somehow lost all of the text without saving. Serves me right I guess…
altho, I might have a cup of coffee in the morning and take another crack at it. Can’t believe how many questions actually felt good to answer…
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